I've been feeling sore like this for a solid month, I'd say. I literally cannot wait to get home and run into my room to take off this evil device of torture known to the common folk as "the bra". I'm just slightly baffled at why all of a sudden I'm feeling more discomfort now then ever before.
I guess I can say that the numbness from my first lung surgery never really subsided and it is, in fact, still sore around my back. My ribs, however, have slowly but surely almost completely healed (finally). My right side - mainly the incision under my pit - has seemed to get worse as time goes by. Is this the healing process? If so, it sucks.
The line of the incision is directly under where my bra sits on all of my bra's except one. I have one t-shirt bra from Victoria's Secret that is the only semi comfortable one to wear nowadays. The sad truth about this particular bra, however, is that it is about one full cup size too small and is hot pink with black polka dots. Wearing this lovely undergarment is nearly impossible with probably 94% of my wardrobe.
So what does this mean for me? Will I have to resort to giant old lady bra's with no sex appeal whatsoever? How long will this misery last? I guess if I could handle getting my vag cut open twice and not being able to sit for months I could handle a little discomfort around my bra line.
Sorry - but if you haven't realized I'm blunt by now, you're clearly not paying much attention.
I have noticed something extremely weird though. If my left arm is slightly raised when I cough I can actually feel the exact area that was sliced through to get to my lung...and I can see it. How fucking weird is that shit! It's actually quite freak show-esque. See for yourself:
Visually, I guess I'm doing better. The redness is starting to fade and little by little my left lung incision is starting to look better. And obviously, I look fabulous in general. Ha.
I've been able to start working out again which I'm super happy about. I've been singing up a storm whenever I can which puts a huge smile on my face and in my heart. My social life has definitely been jump started again so I'm definitely having a good time. Overall I guess things are going well in the living-without-Cancer department. Hopefully the living without part stays that way.
My first CT's following my surgery are scheduled for April 18th. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I won't have to worry about healing in yet another area of my body. Until then...
"I've become...comfortably numb..."
