Pain In My Ass...

Literally.

How many people can literally say they have a pain in their ass? Welp, I can!

Today marks one week since the surgery and all in all, I can say that I don't feel nearly as horrendous as I was mentally preparing myself to feel. The surgeries themselves went as well as they could have. My doctor was able to cut around the nerve in my leg so I have full range of motion and was up and putting weight on my left leg the day after surgery. He also did an ultrasound on my behind while I was under so he was able to pinpoint the tumor in my butt cheek and kept the incision smaller then it was expected to be - as well as saved my tattoo.

I was in the hospital for two nights/days and was released on Easter Sunday around 5pm. Overall, it definitely wasn't the worst hospital stay of my life. I still had my moments of anxiety and breakdowns along with crying sprees to my mother about how uncomfortable I was. Plus, I still had a plethora of tubes coming out everywhere which is always fun but at least I was able to breathe and it didn't feel like an elephant was sitting on my chest.

Surprisingly, I can say that my leg is just starting to hurt and I think it's because I've been up and walking around my house the last few days more then I was right when I got home. However, my butt KILLS. I literally have a pain in my butt. It makes me chuckle.

When I'm standing up straight I can see a small indent in my ass cheek. I realize not too many people are going to see this small imperfection but it still bothers me a little. As if my ass isn't flat enough. Now I have a spot where it actually goes inwards. Greeeaaaat.

When I feel the back of my leg, the incision feels lifted (gross). I'm wondering if this will go down or if it will be a raised scar. Who knows. All I do know is that I'm thankful they didn't damage or destroy the nerve in my leg because otherwise I would definitely be limited to what movements I would be able to perform and probably spend a great deal of a time with a Physical Therapist.

The doctor's team informed us that the margins were clean so they were able to remove all the Cancer cells surrounding the tumors - which is great. But of course, now comes the period of time after the crap that I need to wonder when the next issue(s) will arise. It's not a fun waiting period.

Since I had the surgery, I've had SO much anxiety. They had to give me xanax while I was in the hospital and I've had to take a pill every day since I've been home. I'm not sure if it's because I just started recovering and the whole surgery is still in my mind or if it's because I'm nervous about the future or what. All I know is I find myself crawling out of my skin at least once a day and I need help to control it. It blows.

Anyway, I guess I'm happy with how everything turned out in general. Now comes the wonderful recovery period. I'm already starting to itch at the surgery spots (along with every other part of my body since the pain meds are causing me to want to rip my skin off with my fingernails...) and just like the last surgery I had, the night sweats have begun. I had them for two weeks after my last lung surgery. I'm praying they only last for a short amount of time like that because the last three nights have been horrendous. I've woken up several times each night dripping. And the best part is, I can't shower until my stitches come out on the 15th! So I have to spend ridiculous amounts of time "washing" myself with a towel outside of the tub each day to ensure my ass and leg don't get wet. Yay. This recovery should be fun...